ROB SCHMITZ, HOST:
Now, a story about losing a love but gaining a family. It's part of a series called Songs That Move You from NPR's radio show and podcast Alt.Latino. And in this series, hosts Anamaria Sayre and Felix Contreras hear from a listener.
MAKSIM TSVETOVAT: I'm a Russian Jew by birth and by upbringing, but I found myself culturally homeless.
FELIX CONTRERAS, BYLINE: His name is Maksim Tsvetovat (ph), and the song that moves him is a bolero called "Voy," performed by vocalist Diego el Cigala.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
DIEGO EL CIGALA: (Singing) Voy a tratar de olvidar...
CONTRERAS: The first part of the story is about falling in love.
ANAMARIA SAYRE, BYLINE: Ah, amor.
CONTRERAS: In the late 1990s, Maks (ph) was a recently arrived immigrant who was starting his college classes and living in the U.S. for the first time. And as college students tend to do, Maks found himself head over heels for a fellow student. Or, as he describes it...
TSVETOVAT: Love happened. She was from Venezuela, was also a new immigrant.
SAYRE: Ah, Felix, you know I love a good love story. They fell in love and lived happily ever after?
CONTRERAS: Not quite, but more about that later. What's different about this story is not only did Maks fall intensely in love with a woman - he also fell in love with the culture.
TSVETOVAT: I really didn't feel at home in the American Jewish community. I didn't really feel at home just being an American. I definitely did not feel at home being a Russian. So there was this cultural void that I was looking to fill.
CONTRERAS: You know, that's something we talk about all the time on Alt.Latino, the concept of a shared Latino identity. But in this instance, it was someone from outside of the Latino culture falling in love with Latino culture.
TSVETOVAT: That love happened - a transformation where I started looking more and more towards Latin American culture. And I started wanting to learn Spanish, wanting to learn more about the culture and about the upbringing and the family ties. And I used to joke that I want to find myself a big Latino family and just be adopted there.
CONTRERAS: But things happened, or they didn't happen. And after spending just a short time together, they broke up.
SAYRE: (Gasps) Felix, don't break my heart like this.
TSVETOVAT: When she was gone, I found myself again at this crossroads, where everything that I fell in love with - suddenly, it's all gone. It was like a rug being pulled from under my feet.
(SOUNDBITE OF DIEGO EL CIGALA SONG, "VOY")
SAYRE: I'm hearing a piano. I should have known we were talking about heartbreak.
TSVETOVAT: But the way that song reads, it's like five stages of grief.
CONTRERAS: And as a reminder, those five stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance. And Maks says that the overall sadness of denial is in the dramatic opening chords we hear on the piano. And then we hear this.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
EL CIGALA: (Singing) Voy a mojarme los labios con agua bendita, para lavar los besos que una vez me diera tu boca maldita…
CONTRERAS: The lyrics say, I'm going to wet my lips with holy water to wash away the kisses you gave me with your cursed mouth.
SAYRE: Ooh. Sounds like anger to me.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
EL CIGALA: (Singing) Voy a tratar de olvidar que una vez fuiste mía. Voy con mi sueño a matar el amor de mi vida…
CONTRERAS: And then he says, I'm going to try to forget that you were once mine. I will carry on with the hope of killing the dream of having you as the love of my life.
SAYRE: The finality of acceptance.
CONTRERAS: And then he told me something that is exactly what you and I talk about on the show all the time - the idea of dancing your grief away.
TSVETOVAT: One of the things that I fell in love with Latin music is the idea that you could take a song about suffering and turn that into a salsa. Listen to lyrics of many classic salsas, and it's crazy sad. And people dance to it.
SAYRE: Wait, Felix. Are we sure this dude isn't actually Latino?
CONTRERAS: It's all about the grief, Ana.
TSVETOVAT: Russians love their suffering - Chekhov, Dostoevsky. There is so much suffering that people sort of just revel in it, in the act of suffering. And if you don't suffer, you don't live. I forgot who said this, but the idea is pain is unavoidable. Suffering is optional.
CONTRERAS: And I need to mention here that Maks is a very accomplished musician. He's been playing music since he was a teenager back in St. Petersburg. And he plays a lot of instruments, but mostly flute and piano.
SAYRE: Two instruments very common in all kinds of Latin music - OK. I see you, Maks.
CONTRERAS: Right? OK, now let's go back to the song Maks chose.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
EL CIGALA: (Singing) Voy a mojarme los labios con agua bendita...
SAYRE: Boleros and flamenco - not that common together.
CONTRERAS: Honestly, I didn't think so. But Maks says Russian music and flamenco and some salsa all have something in common.
SAYRE: Seriously?
CONTRERAS: Yep. Check it out.
TSVETOVAT: One of the interesting parallels between Latin music and Slavic music is the use of an Andalusian cadence. Some of the melodies that you hear in salsa are actually very reminiscent of melodies you would hear in Russian music. There is a very specific reason - because so much of the Russian popular music is driven by the melodies that came through Hungary and Ukraine and Romania into Russia and bringing flamenco melodies into Spain and Latin America.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
EL CIGALA: (Singing) Voy a tratar de olvidar que una vez fuiste mía. Voy...
SAYRE: OK, OK. I get it. He's been able to intellectualize how he thinks he connects the music. But how does he feel? How is his heart today? Is it healed?
CONTRERAS: I'll let him have the last word.
TSVETOVAT: I mean, I hardly remember what her face looked like. But the emotions are right there. They're all accessible. And, you know, when you give someone - so much soul to a person or where you give so much soul to an idea, it's really hard to let go.
(SOUNDBITE OF DIEGO EL CIGALA SONG, "VOY")
SCHMITZ: Maksim Tsvetovat, speaking with NPR's Felix Contreras and Anamaria Sayre. They host Alt.Latino, a show about Latin music and culture, and they want to hear about a song that moved you. Write to them at alt.latino@npr.org.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "VOY")
EL CIGALA: (Singing) Tu boca maldita. Tu boca maldita. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.
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